Forced Marriage in Great Britain!

Posted: August 9, 2012 in Abuse, Bible, Christian, Forced Marriage, Jesus, Slavery
Tags: , , , , ,

Rebecca’s* parents tried to drown her in the bath when she refused to marry the man they had lined up for her.  She was grabbed by the hair and had her head dunked below water, leaving her gasping for breath. A violent wrestle saw her set free but she knew she had to escape her childhood home, so Rebecca ran away. She could have ended up in the hands of traffickers, pimps, paedophiles or drug dealers but angels must have been guiding her because she ran into the hands of local police officers who offered her protection from the family members who were trying to track her down.  When I heard what had happened I was surprised to learn that this had taken place in the UK.

The conflict all began when Rebecca had refused to marry a man she didn’t really know and certainly didn’t love. She explained that forced marriages are happening regularly in this country but that many of us British citizens are oblivious to it. Recently news of a young girl being forced into marriage hit headlines, highlighting that many minors are being paired up with men much older than them whilst they are still of school age.  It is estimated that around 8,000 women a year are forced into a marriage against their will in Great Britain, but if they rebel the consequences can be disasterous.

Rebecca recounted how at a young age she was taken on holiday and introduced to a man old enough to be her grandfather, who barely spoke English.  He was considered to be a potential suitor but much to Rebecca’s relief the match did not go ahead. It was when her parents made a second attempt at finding her a husband that she found herself threatened with death for refusing to consent.  The man in question was the same age as Rebecca and living in the same country, but she didn’t want to marry him. The words ‘honour’ and ‘shame’ littered our conversation as she tried to explain how a child’s failure to comply with their parents wishes results in the family being shunned by other members of their Community.

David Cameron made a bold move recently when he spoke out about this issue saying, “Forced marriage is abhorrent and is little more than slavery. To force anyone into marriage against their will is simply wrong and that is why we have taken decisive action to make it illegal”. It is a pivotal moment in history when our Prime Minister announces his desire to criminalise the practice of forced marriage in England & Wales, following Scotland’s lead.  2012 will be an historic year if the plans go ahead.  The goal is to protect ‘victims’ of the practice and could see some parents imprisoned for making their children enter wedlock with consent.

Freedom to choose who you want to marry is a beautiful gift, but sadly one that many people don’t have. It is universally accepted, regardless of race, culture and religion, that it is wrong is to force any human being to do something against their will, so may we care enough to be moved to spread the word about the proposed new legislation (to ensure that it becomes a reality) and pray:

Lord, we pray for an end to the violation of the human rights of all people. We pray for all those involved in the process of making forced marriage illegal – grant them wisdom as they implement new laws to protect the vulnerable.  May all men and women have the freedom to choose who they marry. Amen.

Today Rebecca is a radiant, smiley woman, so until she opens her mouth to share her story you have no idea of the trauma she has been through.  Her difficult background is now bearing fruit as she uses her new found Christian faith to support other girls who have disobeyed a family call to marry someone, sharing with them the power and healing in forgiveness. Whilst most of the focus on forced marriages is on the plight of the women who are subjected to it, Rebcecca is keen for us to acknowledge that many of the men involved are also in a vulnerable situation.

If you or someone you know needs help please visit this Government page: http://www.fco.gov.uk/en/travel-and-living-abroad/when-things-go-wrong/forced-marriage/information-for-victims

*name changed

©Maria Rodrigues-Toth

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